I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
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