Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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