just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Randomize
