420 ftw
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
