i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize