I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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