Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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