it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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