i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
True strength comes from lack of pants
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
