and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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