So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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