It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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