I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Randomize
