He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
