VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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