I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
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