i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
He better not be in your backpack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize