Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
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I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
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Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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