I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
wat bout pragnant strippers??
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.