At least make sure they are 18
Why
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Randomize
