As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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