Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
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