he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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