Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Why are your pants in the freezer?
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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