whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
