His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
