singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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