It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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