in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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