She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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