ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
