Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
