He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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