He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Randomize
