I wannas sexs uuuuu
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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