i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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