Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Randomize
