I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
