I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
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