Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
barbara walters just said penis...
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize