Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
