You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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