can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
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