he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
