just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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