is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
