Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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