Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
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