Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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