He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
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you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
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I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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