he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Randomize
