My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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